How to enjoy Summertime

While at a friend's house today, I was complaining about the length of summer and how I couldn't wait for school to begin.  Most teachers probably don't feel this way, but I am a career mom.  Summer makes me tired, bored, and a little antsy.

She (a teacher too) said this very simple thing: "You are not doing enough."  I looked at her with confusion.  I opened my mouth to explain I was doing lesson plans, assessments, preparing for the next school year - what more did she want?  She explained not school stuff.  I wasn't filling my day with activities.  Then she opened her calendar on her phone, and I realized what she meant.  Her entire month was filled with several activities a day.  Running the gamut from kid friendly fun to home improvement and school work to daily chores.  I sat there for a few minutes and let this piece of wisdom sink in.

She had hit the nail on the head.  The reason I was bored, tired, grumpy, was because I was not feeding my need to accomplish things.  This is something every teacher has in them or we would never survive.  I needed to have a list and be able to scratch things off.

So...I took her advice.  I went home and got on my phone and loaded up my calendar with lots of "activities".  I instantly felt better. Now...if I actually do all of it...well...it's the thought that counts.

Peril of Blind Parenting

As you know I'm a 4th grade teacher.  I assume that gives me a unique perspective on the behaviors of children.  I have seen many different personalities, actions, and reactions.  The most prevalent experience that I have had as a teacher is the blindness of some parents to their child's behavior.  In most cases that blindness causes parents to take the actions of their children as a personal reflection of themselves and then because it has become personal they want to blame anyone or anything else.

As a mom I can see how it is easy to turn a blind eye to our children behaviors.  What I don't see can't hurt me, right?  No....Absolutely not true.  Not dealing with and correcting our child's behavior can be detrimental to our well-being and our child's well-being.  Here are some ways that our lives as parents and our child's growth can be affected:

1. Your child doesn't develop a sense of right and wrong.  

2. Your friends, family, and community will talk about the behaviors of your child.

3.  Your child doesn't develop healthy friendships.

4. You defend your child endlessly and even wrongly.

5.  Your friendships suffer because your friends can't be honest about your child's behavior.

6.  Ultimately your child suffers from believing they are right all the time.

7.  Your marriage and significant relationships fall apart usually because of your defensiveness.

You should defend your child, but only when they need defending.  If your child is in the wrong - they are wrong- end of story.  You must let them know they are wrong.  You must teach them how not to make the same mistake again.  Don't blame yourself - your child did it, not you.  Know that your child's actions are not about you - they will make mistakes.  Growing up is messy - if we don't make mistakes we don't learn, we don't grow, we become stagnant as human beings and ultimately diseased in our relationships with others.  Most of all acknowledge to yourself, to your child, and to others that no one is perfect, including your children.

Freedom on the Fourth!

Fourth of July stands for freedom, right? 

Not if you're a mother of three time-consuming little angels. Every mother knows what I am talking about.  Every mother knows that with the Fourth of July holiday comes summertime.  Which for me, means I am home all day long with my angels.  Now don't get me wrong I love my angels, but as a teacher, I am not accustomed to being with them 24/7.  So here's the plan:  It's a holiday, hubby's off of work, I will have a day to get things done and be ALONE. I wanted and planned on a day of shopping, eating out with my sister-in-law, and enjoying the quiet of my mini-van on the road.  

What I got - two of the three children worried about what was in the Miso soup, not wanting the shrimp because it had sauce on it, and refusing the sushi altogether.  I got rushing around trying to find uniforms of a certain size that apparently are non-existing even though the store had a "big sale" on uniforms.  I got begging, "Mom, please I need this."; "Mom, look at that".  I got to shop for FIREWORKS - don't ever bring children to do that - with little hands grabbing each of the flammable and potentially life and limb threatening objects,  wanting every sparkling promising item in the store.  

I got to enjoy my little angels company all day long!
Now it sounds like I'm complaining, but no, actually I am just expressing what every mother feels once in a while when they are completely overwhelmed by being a mother.  I love them, but sometimes I dream of a cloudy sky and me in a hammock sleeping away the day!

We ended the day with fireworks and BBQ - a perfect balancing act if I say so myself.  Enjoy your fourth of July weekend, everyone!!!

Tip of the Day

Shop for fireworks for the next year holidays (New Years Eve) right after this holiday season.  Fireworks are usually discounted up to 50 - 75% off the day after Fourth of July.  You can easily store them on a high shelf (out of the reach of wanderlust hands), and in a dark, cool closet or utility room.  

If you live out of town, depending on your areas regulations, sparklers make a great summertime activity on any day to light up your angels spirit and hearts.